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A publication for older adults in Manitoba, Canada. Available in print or as a digital download.
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V8N11 - April 12-May 2, 2010:

 
Spotlight feature:
Amy Persson
Winnipeg, Manitoba

 

Amy Persson


Every once in awhile you’ll come across an extraordinary individual who will leave an everlasting impression... and Amy Persson does just that, in a good way, of course. She goes by her maiden name and is a down-to-earth, matter-of-fact kind of person who admires hard-working, ambitious people. It takes one to know one. Amy was always ready to lend a hand whenever she was needed. She easily makes friends and she can talk to you about almost anything. She is up on current affairs—in the news, and even in sports. The Olympics, especially, had her captivated. Amy enjoyed physical activities throughout her life such as ballroom dancing, baseball, curling, golf and tennis. Other passions are music and cooking – both stemming from her early years.

Amy plays the organ and piano and had played for weddings on occasion. She also ran a music store in Calgary called ‘Radio Crafts Record Bar’ shortly after marrying her military husband in 1950. “We carried everything in the store,” states Amy. She fondly recalls the 1/2 hour on-air radio program that she helped host. She developed a vast knowledge, and record collection, in all genres of music. She has many collector albums in perfect condition that she plans on selling in the near future.

Being a military wife, Amy had moved 34 times, with postings in France, Germany, and Canada including Ottawa (three times), Edmonton and even Northern Quebec. She met some famous and interesting musicians in her travels. While stationed in Ottawa, Amy worked at Eaton’s. One day, she went across the street for lunch at a family-run restaurant. It happened to be owned by Paul Anka’s Lebanese-born parents. Paul was only 13 years old, at the time, when Amy spoke to him and learned his name, although he was not famous yet. He had been singing in his church choir and was becoming a child prodigy. When he was 14, he was writing his own songs, entering amateur contests, and had recorded his first single. Amy also met the well-known Mart Kenny and His Western Gentleman— Canada’s leading Ballroom Dance Band in the 1930’s and 40’s. She recalls their theme song as being, “The West, a Nest and You, Dear.” You may have heard their CRBC/CBC radio program, 'Sweet and Low” recorded and broadcast in Vancouver and then Toronto. Kenny retired from the band in 1969, but continued on with several music projects right up into the 80’s, and became a Member of the Order of Canada in 1980.

Both of Amy’s parents are from Sweden. Amy was born in Canada, but never spoke English until the age of 10 when she started school, learning quickly. She is the oldest of four siblings from Conrich, Alberta, just 20 miles east of Calgary. Her parents had a large farm that included 2000 chickens. Her father drove to Calgary where Amy and her sisters sold eggs at 15¢/dozen during the depression years.

Amy’s mother graduated as a dietician in Stockholm, Sweden. Amy learned a lot of her cooking skills just by watching her mother. However, she tells of a time when she was only seven years old and a hired hand on her parents’ farm had requested an apple pie for dinner. Amy attempted the feat on her own and probably would have mastered it if only she hadn’t forgotten the lard in the crust. For those of you who don’t know what the outcome is for leaving out that ingredient, well, Amy explains, with a chuckle... “When I was rolling out the dough, it just kept springing back. Finally, I was able to get the apple filling in. But after it was baked, the dough curled up like an igloo and was hard as rock!” But everything else was perfect and that is very impressive for a seven-year-old. Also impressive, was that Amy had her drivers’ license at the age of 12 with special permission from the premier of Alberta. Her father had tuberculosis and had to stay in a sanatorium for four long years, not even being able to go outside until his third year there. Amy’s mother did not drive, so her father asked permission for Amy to be able to drive her mother to visit each weekend in their Model T Ford. Due to strict measures, Amy was only able to visit on the other side of the glass.

When Amy finally settled in Winnipeg, she, herself, became a dietician because she loves to cook and is health conscious of what she eats... most of the time... like all of us. She has many family favourite recipes such as the often difficult-to-make Baked Alaskan that is a cake with ice cream covered in meringe and baked in the oven! Others are her Apple Crisp, Brownies (with dark chocolate) and Swedish Meatballs. She worked at the Grace Hospital, in the kitchen, of course. And, keeping close to her heritage, Amy had volunteered at the Scandinavian Pavilion on Erin Street during Folklorama for about 10 years.

She is proud of her daughter, Inga, who works for Mayor Katz, and her son, Earl, who is retired from the police force.

At age 82, Amy struggles with some health issues. She survived colon cancer but surgery left her with a damaged spleen. She needed 34 blood transfusions and spent three months in a B.C. hospital ICU. With all the surgeries for her colon cancer, she is left with a severe hernia. She wears a nitrogen patch for her heart and is undergoing more tests for other issues. Despite that, with the help of a walker, she gets around and she’ll go the extra mile, or several, to the Grant Park mall, or other closer places, on her scooter. She wishes she could do more, and she will once she feels more up to it. She may even volunteer at Age & Opportunity. She has friends all over the world and keeps in touch with many of them, keeping Canada Post very busy.

She is also working on her autobiography to record all the fascinating stories she accumulated during her travels around the planet... and she has many!

(Read more in the Apr 12-May 2/2010 issue of Senior Scope)


 

Manitoba Society of Seniors is pleased to announce the kick-off to the 2010 Manitoba Lotteries 55 Plus Games

KILLARNEY TO HOST MANITOBA LOTTERIES 55 PLUS GAMES

Volunteers in Killarney are preparing to host the 2010 Manitoba Lotteries 55 Plus Games from June 15 to 17. About 1,500 participants age 55 and over from across Manitoba are expected to compete in 23 events during the Games, ranging from golf, track & field, tennis and cycling to floor curling, shuffleboard and card games.

For the past 28 years, Manitoba Society of Seniors (MSOS), along with a host community, organizes and runs the 55 Plus Games each June. This is the only annual multi-sport event for active adults 55 plus for the Province of Manitoba, and is one of the largest annual multi-sport events to take place in the province. Manitoba Lotteries is title sponsor for this year’s Games.

“We are privileged to be the title sponsor for the Manitoba Lotteries 55 Plus Games again this year, and support MSOS in its promotion of active living and friendly competition for older adults in Manitoba,” said Winston Hodgins, President and CEO of Manitoba Lotteries.

Many of the Manitoba Lotteries 55 Plus Games events and entertainment will take place in Killarney’s Shamrock Centre, with the swimming competition being held in Boissevain’s pool. The Games features a mix of play-off events and open events (in which participants do not need to qualify).

“The Manitoba Lotteries 55 Plus Games promote active living for Manitobans age 55 and over,” said MSOS Executive Director Kimberly Weihs. “Many participants return each year to enjoy friendly competition and see friends they’ve made at the Games.”

Registration deadlines for play-off events are in April and early May (dates vary depending on region and event) and open event registration closes May 14. MSOS members pay a registration fee of $13 per event and non-members pay the $13 registration fee plus the cost of a MSOS membership.

A full list of events, schedules, as well as registration forms and event descriptions are available on the MSOS website at www.msos.mb.ca
or by calling Marcia Dzik at 942-3147,
ext 302 or 1-800-561-6767.

The Manitoba Society of Seniors is a non-profit organization formed in 1979. Our mission is to represent Manitobans age 50 plus by promoting their needs and concerns and by presenting a positive image of older adults in the community.

For more information, contact:
Marcia Dzik, Coordinator,
Development & Active Living Programs
Manitoba Society of Seniors Inc.
204-942-3147 ext 302 active@msos.mb.ca

(Read more in the Apr 12-May 2/2010 issue of Senior Scope)


 

 

AMENDMENTS PROPOSED TO RESIDENTIAL TENANCIES ACT

(Apr. 6/10) Finance Minister Greg Selinger introduced proposed amendments to Manitoba's Residential Tenancies Act which include provisions which would allow landlords to request a pet deposit.

"By allowing a landlord to collect a separate pet damage deposit, we are hoping more landlords will permit pets," said Selinger. "The pet deposit would act as a damage deposit specific to any damage to a rental property caused by a pet."

Landlords in Manitoba are not required to accept pets but, if they choose to do so, they would be entitled to collect a pet damage deposit of one half month's rent in addition to the existing security deposit.

Other proposed amendments would give the director of the Residential Tenancies Branch authority to:

- Deal with tenancy agreements under which services such as meals, laundry or housekeeping services are provided by the landlord for a separate charge in addition to rent. Proposals include requiring a standard tenancy agreement be used which would set out the tenant services provided, written notice for any increase in the charge for tenant services and a process for dealing with claims against the tenant services security deposit.

- Determine claims by landlords against guarantors where a tenant has defaulted in their obligation under a tenancy agreement such as paying rent.

- Impose administrative penalties on landlords and tenants for failing to comply with orders made under
specified sections of the act or contravening those sections, such as a landlord's duty not to withhold vital services and a tenant's duty not to impair the safety of others in the building.

"We are pleased to introduce additional protections for seniors. Hospitality services such as meals, laundry and housekeeping will now be covered by the act. If landlords want to increase the rates charged for these services or withdraw or reduce services, they will now have to adhere to the conditions under the Residential Tenancies Act such as providing notice and opportunities for appeals," said Selinger.

In addition, to streamlining hearings before the Residential Tenancies Commission on appeal, the amendment would give authority for certain matters to be heard by the chief commissioner or a deputy chief commissioner instead of a panel of three commissioners.

The bill can be seen at www.manitoba.ca/rtb

...........................................................

PROVINCE OVERHAULS PENSION BENEFITS ACT

Most Significant Changes in 35 Years Would Secure Manitobans' Pensions into the Future: Howard

(Mar. 26/10) Meeting the needs of today's workforce with improved security, flexibility and greater transparency of pension plans is part of a revised Pension Benefits Act and regulations, Labour and Immigration Minister Jennifer Howard announced today.

"Manitobans will have one of the strongest pension systems in Canada, well ahead of changes being proposed in other jurisdictions," said Howard.  "We want Manitobans to know these changes are about your money, your future and your voice."

These changes would represent the most significant overhaul of the Pension Benefits Act in 35 years, providing Manitoba workers with a strengthened, modernized act and regulations, the minister said. The new regulations under the Pension Benefits Act will focus on:

· responding to changes in today's workforce,
· greater accountability, and
· security for pensions into the future.

The new provisions would recognize and be better suited to the realities of today's workforce with employees changing jobs more often, increased interest by workers in managing their retirement funds and employers' desire to retain experienced workers, the minister said. Proposed changes:

· From the day employees join the plan, they will be entitled to the pension benefits they earn under the plan rather than having to wait up to two years. Workers staying in their jobs past the age of 65 and choosing to defer receiving their pension would see their benefits increase when they do retire.

· Plans would no longer be able to apply excessive pension reductions when workers retire early.

· Workers nearing retirement would be able to work reduced hours and continue pension contributions while collecting partial pension benefits. This phased retirement would support workforce renewal and mentoring; and,

· Pension plans can offer members options to buy flexible benefits such as enriched early retirement benefits and cost-of-living adjustments.                                                                           

Increasing accountability, expanding reporting requirements and ensuring input from pension plan members and retirees in the management of plans would provide increased transparency, Howard said. For example:

· For most plans with 50 members or more, workers and retirees would have representatives on newly required pension committees providing members with greater input into pension plan administration.

· A new provision would allow members and employers to decide how to distribute the surplus.

Measures are being taken to bring greater security to pension benefits now and in the future, the minister said.

· Spouses or common-law partners of deceased pension plan members would be allowed to waive entitlements to payments, allowing others such as children to receive the funds.

· A number of new provisions would bring clarity and greater equity to calculating the amount of pension available to spouses or common-law partners after a relationship breakdown and Manitoba will now recognize court orders from other provinces.

· Employers opting to temporarily cease making contributions into plans would have to maintain a minimum surplus of five per cent of plan liabilities.

· Employer contributions would be required to be made monthly instead of quarterly, improving the financial position of plans.

Manitoba has the second-highest pension plan coverage in Canada with 46 percent of the paid labour force participating while the national average is only 39 percent. Manitoba is the only province to require that all employees belong to a pension plan, when one is offered.

"Working Manitobans and those planning for retirement will see greater flexibility and protection of pension plans and that their views from previous consultation have been heard," said Howard.

For more information on Manitoba's Pension Benefits Act and regulation go to www.gov.mb.ca/labour/pension/

...........................................................

PROVINCE SEEKS PUBLIC INPUT
ON CANADA'S RETIREMENT INCOME SYSTEM

Manitobans Encouraged to Participate in Consultation Process: Wowchuk

(Mar. 25/10) Residents of Manitoba are being asked to provide input on ways to strengthen Canada's retirement income system by participating in a consultation process over the next month, Finance Minister Rosann Wowchuk announced today.

Research commissioned for the finance ministers' review of pension coverage and retirement income adequacy indicates many workers who don't have access to employer-sponsored pension plans or who don't have sufficient personal savings will not have adequate retirement income in the future.

"Our government wants to be a part of the solution and we are looking to Manitobans to share their ideas on
how the system can be improved,"
said Wowchuk.

The minister said Manitobans are welcome to share their views by responding to the consultation paper by mail or email.  The paper asks a variety of questions on how best to address challenges with Canada's retirement income system. 

The paper also presents and is looking for comments and opinions on a number of ideas including:

· expansion of the existing Canada Pension Plan;
· creation of a voluntary, defined-
contribution supplement to the CPP;
· modernization of pension standards to improve flexibility in pension plan design;
· tax reform – changes to the Income Tax Act (Canada); and
· a blend of measures , combining some or all of the above.

The minister noted this paper is being presented for public feedback to help stimulate public discussion. Results of the consultation will help to inform discussions at the next federal, provincial and territorial finance ministers meeting in May.

More information on how to participate in the consultation process and to access the paper is available at www.gov.mb.ca/finance/index.html. If you do not have access to the Internet, call 204-945-3757 to request a copy.
All responses must be submitted to the provincial government by April 30 by email to feedbackfin@gov.mb.ca or delivered to Minister of Finance, c/o Intergovernmental Finance Branch, Fiscal Research Division, Manitoba Finance, 910 – 386 Broadway, Winnipeg MB R3C 3R6.

..........................................................

MANITOBA CONSUMERS' BUREAU ISSUES ALERT

(Mar. 30/10) The Manitoba Consumers' Bureau advises the public and businesses to be aware that Y.E.P. Youth Employment Program is no longer licensed as a direct seller in Manitoba. Y.E.P. Youth Employment Program hires young people to sell candy products, usually at shopping malls or outside large retailers, but the company is not licensed effective March 26.

The Consumer Protection Act requires any company or individual selling goods and services directly to consumers to be licensed. The bureau places important conditions on the licence of a business that employs young workers to direct sell. These conditions have been developed by the bureau in co-operation with the Workplace Safety and Health Division and the Employment Standards Division of Manitoba Labour and Immigration and are intended to protect young people. In addition, all direct sellers must comply with legislation and must not engage in deceptive practices or make misleading statements.

Retailers are asked to check with the Consumers' Bureau before permitting any type of direct selling on their property. Consumers should also confirm that a direct seller is properly licensed before making a purchase.

To find out if a business needs to be licensed and is properly licensed, to make a complaint or to get more
information, contact the Consumers' Bureau at 204-945-3800, 1-800-782-0067 (toll-free) or by email
at consumersbureau@gov.mb.ca.

To obtain information on the protections that are in place for young workers, contact the Workplace Safety and Health Division at 945-6848 or toll-free at 1-800-282-8069, and the Employment Standards Division at 945-3352 or toll-free
at 1-800-821-4307.

(Read more in the Apr 12-May 2/2010 issue of Senior Scope)


Financial Planning Solutions
The Tax Planned Will
Creating Tax Savings for Your Spouse and the Next Generation
BRIAN G. KONRAD CFP, Financial Consultant

Lawyers and notaries often recommend the creation of trusts within wills for reasons that do not relate to tax. Common scenarios include the management of property for young beneficiaries or the disabled, or for a spouse where there is a desire to preserve the capital for the next generation. While these are all valid reasons for the creation of trusts, the tax savings opportunities of
testamentary trusts are often overlooked.

First a little background

A trust is a legal relationship under which a person, referred to in trust jargon as the “settlor”, gives up ownership of property and transfers control over the property to a trustee, or group of trustees, who manage the property for the benefit of other persons, called the “beneficiaries”. When a trust is referred to as a testamentary trust, it means control over the property was transferred to the trustees as a consequence of the death of the settlor.

This is in contrast to an inter vivos trust, where the transfer of property is made during the life-time of the settlor. The terms of a testamentary trust are most commonly documented within the will of the settlor. However, outside of Quebec, a testamentary trust can also be created under the terms of an insurance beneficiary declaration made separate from the settlor’s will for the purpose of receiving proceeds payable under life insurance policies. The distinction between inter vivos trusts and testamentary trusts is important for reasons of taxation. While the undistributed annual income of an inter vivos trust is taxed at the top personal rate (top personal tax rates range from a low of 39% in Alberta to a high of 48.2% in Québec)*, testamentary trusts benefit from the same graduated rates of tax as individuals. The ability to create a separate taxpayer in the form of a trust, with access to its own graduated rates, is a significant tax planning opportunity.

Example of tax savings

Let’s first examine how a testamentary trust can save tax for a surviving spouse:

George is a retired businessman who earns an annual income of $50,000 from his non-registered investments. His spouse, Ellen, is a retired teacher who earns approximately the same amount as George each year from her pensions and registered retirement income fund (RRIF). Both Ellen and George are over the age of 65 and qualify for Old Age Security (OAS) and Canada Pension Plan (CPP)/Quebec Pension Plan (QPP). Their continued on next page combined after-tax income is $99,345, calculated as follows:

 

Investment Income
(George) $50,000

Pension Income
(Ellen) $50,000

CPP/QPP
($10,313 each) $20,626

Old Age Security
($5,903 each) $11,806


Total Income $132,433
Combined Tax
(Federal & Ontario)* (31,901)


Combined
After-tax Income $100,532

Now let’s assume that Ellen is a widow and, like most married Canadians, George had left his entire estate directly to his surviving spouse. In these circumstances Ellen’s after-tax income would be $75,664, calculated as follows:


Investment Income $50,000
Pension Income $50,000
CPP/QPP $10,365
Old Age Security $5,903


Total Income $116,268
Combined Tax &
Repayment of OAS* (39,935)


After-tax Income $75,333

In comparison to their combined after-tax income while George was still living, Ellen’s after-tax income
has dropped by $24,199. Only $5,903 of this reduction is accounted for by the loss of George’s Old Age Security. The rest is the result of two factors; 1) the increased taxes payable when all family income is reported in the hands of one spouse; and 2) Ellen’s tax bill is more than $7,300 higher than their combined family tax bill when George was still living.

In Canada, Old Age Security is reduced at the rate of 15% for every dollar of income in excess of $63,511*, resulting in a total repayment of Old Age Security when income levels reach approximately $103,000. When Old Age Security is taken into account, seniors with income in excess of $63,511 are subject to the highest rates of taxation in Canada. In this example, Ellen pays tax on her income between $63,511 and $103,000 at an effective marginal rate in excess of 49%.

What could George have done differently?

Let’s assume that, instead of leaving his estate directly to Ellen, George created a trust for Ellen under his Will. The trust would provide Ellen with a right to all income generated by the trust’s investments and the trustees would have the power to access the trust’s capital for Ellen’s benefit. Ellen could even be one of the trustees involved in the trust’s management.

So how would such an arrangement benefit Ellen? As a trust created under George’s Will would be a testamentary trust, an opportunity exists to income split. Ellen would receive all of the trust’s income to use as she sees fit, but an Income Tax Act election can be made allowing the trust to retain responsibility for reporting the income. Let’s return to our example to highlight the benefit of such an income splitting strategy.

Investment Income
(Reported By Trust) $50,000

Pension Income
(reported by Ellen) $50,000
CPP/QPP $10,365

Old Age Security
(reported by Ellen) $5,903


Total Income $116,268
Total Tax* (28,433)

After-tax Income $87,835


For Ellen, the tax savings would amount to $11,502 annually. Even after paying some additional fees for the preparation of a trust tax return, many would view the tax savings as significant. If the assets from George’s estate produced a higher level of income, the savings would be greater.

What about the next generation?

High tax bracket children can also benefit from this income splitting strategy. Receiving their inheritance indirectly through a testamentary trust can give a high tax bracket beneficiary the ability to generate a higher level of after-tax income. Separate trusts can be created under a parent’s will for each child and his or her respective family. Discretion is usually given to the trustees over the distribution of income among family members. Annual income can be distributed to the high-tax bracket beneficiary for his or her own use, but the income can be taxed at lower rates within the trust. Alternatively, when income can be used to benefit a person with little or no income of their own (such as a beneficiary of school age or university age) it may be preferable to have the income reported in the hands of the beneficiary. This will allow for the utilization of the beneficiary’s basic personal tax credit, which shelters the first $9,039 of income from federal tax*.

The tax efficiency of a trust can be further enhanced if the trust’s investments produce “eligible” dividend income earned from Canadian corporations. Where trust income is used to assist a beneficiary with no other income, such a beneficiary can receive up to $66,420 in dividend income before having to pay federal income tax (although in most provinces some provincial tax will be payable beginning at lower income levels).

Who should consider the tax planned will?

Anyone who has accumulated wealth in the form of non-registered assets should consider this strategy. Such assets could include, but would not be limited to, real estate, stocks, bonds, mutual funds and shares in
private corporations. Also take into consideration the proceeds of any life insurance policies that will be payable on death. Very often retired business owners and farmers are good candidates, but by no means is the strategy restricted by occupational background. From a tax standpoint, the decision to utilize a testamentary trust turns as much on the income that can be generated from the trust’s assets, as it does on the underlying value of the assets. If the potential beneficiary is a surviving spouse, the major limitation relates to Registered Retirement Savings Plans (RRSPs), Registered Retirement Income Funds (RRIFs) and other forms of registered accounts. With these types of accounts, significant tax deferral will be lost if, on your death, the accounts are not transferred to your spouse in their registered form. In the event you have no surviving spouse, directing registered accounts through your will to a testamentary trust can still be good tax planning.

First steps

To determine whether this strategy makes sense in your situation, you need to first arrive at a reasonable projection of the after-tax value of your estate and the income it can be expected to generate. With this information in hand, an estimate can be made of the potential tax savings that can be achieved for your heirs through a tax planned will. These type of projections are best done by your financial advisor in consultation with your accountant where necessary. Please do not hesitate to contact us if you would like to discuss your particular situation and to determine how a “tax planned will” can assist your family.
__________________

BRIAN G. KONRAD CFP
Financial Consultant
brian.konrad2@investorsgroup.com
(204) 489-4640 ext. 246
100-1345 WAVERLEY STREET
WINNIPEG, MB R3T 5Y6
1-888-205-4828
www.investorsgroup.com/consult/brian.konrad

Stephanie Graham
(204) 489-4640 ext. 267


This report specifically written and published by Investors Group is presented as a general source of information only, and is not intended as a solicitation to buy or sell specific investments, nor is it intended to provide legal advice. Prospective investors should review the annual report, simplified prospectus, and annual information form of any fund carefully before making an investment decision. Clients should discuss their situation with their Consultant for advice based on their specific circumstances. Insurance products and services offered through I.G. Insurance Services Inc. (in Quebec, a financial services firm). Insurance license sponsored by The Great-West Life Assurance Company (outside of Quebec).
™Trademark owned by IGM Financial Inc. and licensed to its subsidiary corporations.
“You may have a tax time bomb ticking and not even know it”
©2007 Investors Group Inc. Investors Group Financial Services Inc.

(Read more in the Apr 12-May 2/2010 issue of Senior Scope)



William J. Thomas

I have a new computer and I hate the blasted thing

Everybody told me I needed a new computer so I went out and bought one. The Acer Aspire is a spiffy-looking laptop with approximately three hundred features I will never use. I use a computer exclusively to receive and send emails and browse the poetic messages left in the spam department. “Your schlong could be schlonger.” Who comes up with this stuff? Howie Mandel?

Everybody said I needed new software to go with the new computer because that system was really old. I think I was using Storm Windows One. So I bought new software and the day after I bought the computer I was told to upgrade from Vista to Windows 7 because, well, that’s what you must do. Upgrade, in order to stay a step ahead of the hackers and spammers and evil virus whammers. Upgrades, I am told, mean better security. It’s why I need Norton. It’s why ships off the coast of Somalia need armed guards. It’s why Tiger Woods needs a locking mechanism on his bedroom door that can’t be opened with a sand wedge.

Staples sent their ace techie out to install the computer for me and it actually worked… for a while. The next day everything went black and I called “Ace” at Staples and after some fairly intricate investigative work we determined that he had forgot to plug the computer into the wall socket. It had run on a battery for a day before it died.

Everybody said because I live near open water and so close to the United States that I needed to buy Rogers Rocket Stick. This I did and the difference was incredible. My monthly Rogers charge of forty bucks skyrocketed to $340.00 due to U.S. roaming fees on a cell phone I never use.

But the computer was still not allowing me to see my emails. Then everybody said I needed an extension on my Rogers Rocket Stick to get it higher up on my office window in order to better attract a signal which I assume is being bounced off two Chinese satellites like a lead-lined ping-pong ball. And the Rocket won’t be stretched by just any old extension cord. No, I needed a special USB adapter costing $29.99 or approximately ten dollars per foot. That idiot on TV who dances and sings “I am the cashman!” will sell me a repossessed gold chain for less than ten dollars a foot.

Oh, and speaking of TV’s, in the middle of this high tech dog’s breakfast I was forced to buy two digital converters for my TV sets in order to continue to bring in the three main American networks with my rotar antenna tower. And you know what? It worked. I can now get NBC, CBS and ABC quite well. Unfortunately I can no longer get Canadian TV stations without disabling the digital connection.

I also picked up some weird channel called Retro TV that runs episodes of “The A Team” twenty four hours a day and for a month now I’ve been walking around the house saying “I pity the fool!”

At about the same time my underground telephone cable died so the Bell guy installed a temporary cable that has that kind of loud, annoying hum on the line like the Mounties are using really outdated wire tap equipment. But I have to admit I like my new computer more than I liked the old one.

The old one blocked every effort and every entry route I tried to get into my email page with a big, scary yellow sign that announced: “The Server Cannot Be Found.” This blocker appeared in big bold letters with a yellow border like the words were surrounded by police tape. It frightened me.

I don’t get any of that with my new computer. Although it still won’t let me see my emails, now I get a very pleasant message that comes up with bright white letters on a sea-blue background and it says: “Internet Explorer Cannot Display This Page!” Cool, huh?

I understand that Internet Explorer is trying, really trying to show me my emails but it simply cannot do it at this time. And it encourages me to try again. Which I do, almost every day when I get back from the Port Colborne Library where I receive and reply to all my emails in less than twenty minutes by using their computer. Turns out, I didn’t actually need a new computer. I needed a faster car.

I shouldn’t say my new computer never works because yesterday as I was holding down the clicker on “googlegmail.com” up popped a recipe for spam confetti pasta with a preparation time of 30 minutes. Mine came out a tad dry, mind you, but now it’s not as if I have nothing to show for this one thousand dollar investment in state of the art technology.

This morning things looked promising when I heard a noise, like a big deal announcement sound – “Ta DAA!!”
Then Norton informed me it was tracking eight “cookies” that had entered my programming system! So I requested that recipe too.

I have come to the conclusion that I live in a technological dead zone. Wainfleet is landline, lockdown territory, a place where scientific signals come to commit suicide. I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe and my time machine just blew the breaker box.

Yesterday after tying up their telephone assistance staff for days on end, Rogers offered to send a technician to my house to fix my computer. I pity the fool.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

William J. Thomas lives on Sunset Bay in Wainfleet, Ont. For comments, ideas and copies of The True Story of Wainfleet go to www.williamthomas.ca

(Read more in the Apr 12-May 2/2010 issue of Senior Scope)


Travel

Your gift is a trip anywhere...
Where would you go?

By
Sherry
Dupuis

When I graduated from college my gift from my parents was a trip anywhere I wanted to travel. Growing up I would hear stories from my Grandparents about England. My Grandma had grown up there and my Grandpa a WWll Aircraft mechanic from Canada, and they met and married in York, England. My Grandma, coming to Canada as a war bride, was only able to return home every three years, and that wasn’t until after her children were grown. When my Grandparents planned their next spring time trip I cashed in my gift for a plane ticket to London and an England train pass. This would turn out to be my most cherished travel experience.

From the moment I landed at Heathrow airport and met my Grandparents in the customs line, I knew this was meant to be. My Grandma’s nephew met us at the airport and we started our journey north towards York where my Grandma had spent most of her 22 years in England. Seeing my Grandma in her element and with her siblings is something I will never forget. I was able to get to know the personalities behind the photos that had been shared with us all our lives.

Our first visit was around Yorkshire to see the house where my Grandma was born, and where my Grandparents met at a dance hall some 49 years prior. We went to Betty’s Bar, a coffee shop, where in war time, the guys on leave spent their evenings and had etched their names and rank into a set of mirrors that had been salvaged, and still hangs on the wall. I was able to find and take a photo of my Grandpa’s name. Next to Betty’s Bar was where my Grandma worked at a shoe shop that has now turned into a wool shop. She could watch out the window for my Grandpa to come into town on leave and know that it was him coming down the hilly road towards the shops. Across the square was the old Terry’s Chocolate Tea Room and reception hall where their wedding reception was held. We made our way to Fulford Road where we visited the church they were married in and I was able to photograph them standing in the same spots that they had on their wedding day.

After experiencing York, we went south and experienced the war time stories and locales that my Grandpa had visited when he first arrived in England. I met his cousin and we explored South Hampton and the area where his family had roots although he had been born and raised in Canada. To add a little fun we went to the seaside and took in the Brighton Palace Pier, toured London where my Grandma and I rode carousels, and of course ate fish and chips out of newsprint and shared a few pints in the pubs.

This trip, and the connection to them, made such an impression on me, that 62 years after my Grandparents were married, my husband and I had had our marriage blessed in the Fulford Church on their anniversary. My mother and my sister joined us on this trip, and having been their first to England, I was able to show them all the sites and relay the stories that were told to me by my Grandparents. An experience they never had the opportunity to have first hand because my Grandma and all her siblings had passed away, already, and my Grandpa could not travel the distance.
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Sherry Dupuis is a Cruise and Vacation Specialist with Expedia CruiseShipCenters. Since her England trip in 1993 has explored many countries by land and sea including Belgium, France, Gibraltar, Italy, Monaco, Morocco, Netherlands, Portugal, Scotland, Spain, and Sweden.

(Read more in the Apr 12-May 2/2010 issue of Senior Scope)


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   


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